This week I feel the need to take over Carma's blog. Don't worry, I promise that won't write things that are only sad. Plus it gives Carma some time off :).
Many have asked us how things have been going with the passing of Jenny Sue. I will say there have been lots of tears. I have watched a few videos of her when she was younger and smile through the tears. There are many videos of her but finding the disc is something I am not up to right now.
I have hundreds of disc with memories. I have always been a camera fanatic. Some of the videos I have watched are still on their super 8 cassettes. Only tv I have with a VCR is a older tv that I have no idea how to transfer the movies. I tried taping them but all you seen was the blue lines going up the tv but watching the videos was clear.
How are Carma and Scooby doing? They are okay. You can sense their sadness but hubby and I gave them both time to say good-bye before we took her to the vet. We think they knew what was about to happen. Neither of them asked to go with us. When we brought her home, we had them come out with us to see the burying. We had a funeral for her and I believe this helped them.
Dinnertime is a different story. Carma insisted that I gave Jenny food first. She would watch me in the kitchen to make sure that Jenny got enough to eat. There was never a concern for the amount of food that Jenny got. Carma is a caretaker. She would give Jenny Sue her food if she thought Jenny was still hungry. Problem was, Jenny was ALWAYS hungry or thought she was. Jenny had to be on a certain amount of food. If allowed, I think Jenny would have ate until her stomach burst. We were unable to leave any food or water down after a certain time.
For the last couple of days when it came to dinner, its hard. Carma refused to eat because I had not put a plate down for Jenny. Carma and Scooby have been eating later at night. Their dinner may sit for a hour or two before they eat. It will get better. It is too early for everything to be "normal".
How are hubby and I doing? We have our moments. It is expected. Nothing is normal now. We will be okay. Its hard. I know that it seems that all the months of little sleep have caught up with us. The only way I can explain it that some of you may understand is after your baby starts sleeping through the night for the first time. You don't know how exhausted you are until you are not getting up and down all hours of the night.
Jenny seem to never sleep anymore. Maybe it was due to being uncomfortable or maybe because she was always hungry. Her nails on the hardwood floor in the hallway was a constant thing. She would come in my room at night and just walk in circles around my bed. I have hardwood floors. She would also wait until she felt no movement in the house to sneak in the backroom and potty. I would be up and down all hours of the night putting her outside to potty but in the mornings there would still be puddles of pee. I still hear her walking in the hallway at night.
Carma still tells me when it is 7 o'clock. That is when Jenny got her insulin shot. Its hard to quit a job you have decided you needed to do when you are a service dog.
Scooby won't lay under the bench where Jenny and him cuddled together. It will be okay. Nothing is normal right now.
As the sun starts to come out and the clouds go away, I see my spring flowers popping up out of the ground. We have a fresh beginning to try to learn. 13 years is a long time to just let it all heal in just a weekend. It will take time. We will be okay but our hearts are still hurting.
I hope you have a wonderful week and that I was able to answer the questions that I have been asked the most. I hope you come back tomorrow for our post about Groundhog day.
Thank you from the bottom of our hearts for all the love you have shown us over the last few days.
We are so blessed to have you all in our lives.